Summary
Author: Sonali Deraniyagala
Publisher: Knopf (New York). 240 pp.
Type of work: Memoir
Time: 2004–13
Locales: Sri Lanka, London, New York
Sonali Deraniyagala's memoir "Wave" offers a heartrending account of the 2004 tsunami that claimed the lives of her husband, sons, and parents. In it, she recounts the overwhelming grief that engulfed her in the aftermath, detailing her journey through profound sorrow over the following years. The memoir serves as both a tribute to her lost family and a testament to her gradual healing process.
The Arrival of the Tsunami
When the tremendous wave approached, Sonali Deraniyagala initially observed it with mild curiosity, noticing the waves rising higher than usual. She was vacationing with her family on December 26, 2004, focusing on her sons and husband, unaware of the impending calamity. A sudden surge of water swept in with devastating speed and power, forcing Deraniyagala and her family to flee in a jeep. Despite their efforts, the wave overtook them, flipping the vehicle and continuing its relentless advance before drawing back to the sea. Deraniyagala was discovered in a swamp, injured and partially unclothed, and taken to a clinic where she grappled with the incomprehensible reality of what had occurred. "Something came for us," she continually thought.
The Aftermath of Loss
Deraniyagala's narrative begins with this life-altering day. Her husband and children were torn from her when the jeep overturned, and her parents remained trapped in the hotel. Overnight, her entire family vanished. From this chaotic day, "Wave" unfolds two intertwined narratives: her profound grief upon learning of her family's demise and her long, arduous journey to replace that grief with cherished memories of those she lost.
Physical and Emotional Wounds
Initially, Deraniyagala's injuries were physical. She suffered internal damage from the jeep incident and later contracted an infection from contaminated seawater. Post-hospitalization, her battle shifted to a psychological one as she confronted the reality of her immense loss. Overwhelmed by shock and sorrow, she soon found herself engulfed by anger and self-destructive tendencies. The early chapters of her memoir span several years swiftly, yet her healing process was anything but quick.
During her time in Colombo, Sri Lanka, Deraniyagala wrestled with suicidal thoughts, indulged in excessive drinking, and mixed alcohol with medication in an attempt to escape her torment. The hallucinations induced by these substances provided a temporary refuge from her pain. She describes how these experiences distanced her from reality, allowing her to evade the pain of her loss.
Projecting Pain
In her despair, Deraniyagala tried to transfer her agony onto others. She recounts terrorizing a Dutch family who had moved into her Colombo home, banging on their gates late at night, making eerie late-night calls, and employing other tactics to drive them away. Though no charges were pressed, she expresses remorse in her memoir for causing them distress.
Attempting to Escape Memories
Years passed before Deraniyagala could return to London, to the home she shared with her husband and children. In an effort to distance herself from her grief, she traveled extensively, while friends in London maintained her home for her return. She was still mired in shock and torment, plagued by guilt for taking her family to Yala, the resort where the tragedy struck.
Upon finally returning to London, she immersed herself in the memories held within their home. As she moved from room to room, she encountered reminders of their life together, gradually shifting her focus from reconciling her family's death to reliving nostalgic moments: Vikram's passion for nature, Steve's cricket fervor, and Malli's creative spirit. This process helped her...
(This entire section contains 1154 words.)
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build connections with her cousin's children, sharing similar experiences she had cherished with her own sons.
Embracing Memories
Yet, her joyful recollections were not therapeutic in the traditional sense. "Wave" intertwines these memories with the stark reality of their deaths. Deraniyagala acknowledges that she consciously and subconsciously attempted to suppress memories of her family. In an interview, she admitted wanting to shield herself from any memory during her time in Colombo.
Returning to Yala
Restoration efforts at Yala took considerable time, with remnants of the tsunami's devastation lingering for years. Persuaded by her father-in-law, Deraniyagala returned to the hotel site where the tragedy unfolded. During this visit, a seemingly miraculous event occurred—a page from a report written by Steve landed at their feet. This coincidence prompted a brief emergence from her emotional shell, as she searched for any token of her family's presence.
This experience marked the beginning of her willingness to let memories resurface, particularly in their London home. She discovered places where she and Steve had marked their sons' growth. Initially, she focused on humorous recollections, gradually welcoming more profound memories. One chapter of her memoir is dedicated to her and Steve's love story, exemplifying her realization that the pain of forgetting was more excruciating than the pain of remembering.
Writing as Healing
A native of Colombo, Sonali Deraniyagala now resides in New York City, where she is a visiting scholar at Columbia University's School of International and Public Affairs and an economics professor at the University of London's School of African and Oriental Studies.
Deraniyagala's journey is neither wholly uplifting nor entirely bleak. Two years after the tsunami, she relocated to Manhattan to be closer to her therapist, who encouraged her to capture her memories on paper. These included vivid images of the tsunami's terror. Her move to Manhattan, away from the public eye in Colombo, allowed her to travel between London and Sri Lanka, gradually allowing more memories to surface. Her memoir concludes with the acknowledgment that her recovery continues—wherever she goes, memories or imagined moments with her family accompany her. Though recalling them is painful, she finds that the agony of forgetting is far greater.
Publishing "Wave"
"Wave," constructed from these memories, emerged at the urging of her therapist and a friend. Initially hesitant to publicize such personal and painful experiences, Deraniyagala worried that readers might not engage with her story. Her concerns were unfounded; the book sparked a fierce bidding war among publishers and achieved critical acclaim.
The uniqueness of Deraniyagala's memoir lies not in the tsunami's surreal events but in her candid and poignant narrative of recovery. Critics praise her ability to vividly convey her grief and commend her courage to share her trauma with the world. As readers delve into "Wave," they witness Deraniyagala's ongoing journey to forge a new life, embracing the past while nurturing health and hope for the future.
Review Sources
- Adams, Tim. "The Tsunami Survivor Who Lost Her Whole Family". Rev. of Wave, by Sonali Deraniyagala. Observer. Guardian News and Media, 9 Mar. 2013. Web. 9 Jan. 2014.
- "A Dying Fall." Rev. of Wave, by Sonali Deraniyagala. Kirkus Reviews 1 Feb. 2013: 282. Print.
- Garner, Dwight. "The Tsunami Killed Her Family. She Tells of What Came Next." Rev. of Wave, by Sonali Deraniyagala. New York Times 6 Mar. 2013: C1–C6. Print.
- Strayed, Cheryl. "Washed Away". Rev. of Wave, by Sonali Deraniyagala. New York Times Book Review 24 Mar. 2013: 11. Print.
