What are the main features of Okonkwo's view of masculinity in Things Fall Apart?

Okonkwo views hard work as a masculine trait. He works hard and insists that all those around him have the same work ethic. In fact, he beats his wives and children to keep them in line. His oldest son Nwoye seems to have traits like his grandfather, Unoka. Unoka, Okonkwo's father, was lazy. He did not work. He sat around playing his flute and drinking palm wine. He borrowed money and owed money to many different tribesmen.

Okonkwo detested his father. He despised his laziness. Okonkwo became so hard because of his father's laziness. Okonkwo feared that he would be useless as his father:

While Okonkwo's appearance portrays a man people fear, it belies the terror Okonkwo hides within himself. For his entire life, Okonkwo has had to deal with having a father who is considered weak and lazy—"agabala" in the tribe's terms.

That is why he works so hard. Working hard and beating his wives and children makes Okonkwo feel masculine. He rarely rested. He disliked the Week of Peace because it was against tradition to work that week. Not working made Okonkwo uncomfortable.

Okonkwo was a brave warrior as well. He had five skulls hanging from his belt. This act caused Okonkwo to feel masculine. He drank palm wine out of a human skull from someone he killed in war. Also, Okonkwo was considered a great leader. He participated in governmental affairs. This is another masculine trait of which Okonkwo was proud.

Okonkwo is tough. He is masculine in his rough exterior. He despises gentleness and idleness:

Thus, he despises gentleness, idleness, and demonstrations of sensitivity. He will not allow himself to show love, to enjoy the fruits of hard work, or to demonstrate concern for others, nor can he tolerate these in other men. He rules his family unit with an iron fist and expects everyone to act on his commands.

Sadly, Okonkwo could not get his clan to go to war against the white man who had come into the village. For this reason he hung himself. Although Okonkwo considered himself masculine, he died without honor. He had all the masculine traits, but he died without a proper burial because he hung himself. After achieving great things in his life, he died without a honorable burial. All of his masculine traits could not help him in death.

In "Things Fall Apart", how do Okonkwo's attitudes and actions define masculinity and femininity?

In Things Fall Apart, we could look at the above question from a contrasting study of the characters Okonkwo and Unoka. Unoka is Okonkwo's lazy father. He is considered effeminate because he cannot stand the sight of blood. Also, he sits around all day drinking and playing his flute. His traits are feminine. He borrows money for he does not work. Not working is considered a feminine trait. Unoka was called womanish while Okonkwo was a child. Unoka could not think about war. He feared war. This trait made him womanish:

Unoka, Okonkwo’s father, loves to drink palm wine and play the flute. He is poor, and his wife and children barely have food to eat. Unoka never repays his loans, and the people laugh at him. When Unoka dies, he holds no title, and he is heavily in debt. Okonkwo is ashamed of him.

Okonkwo is quite manly. He wrestled Amalinze the Cat and won. His fame spread throughout the villages. Also, he is a great warrior. He has five skulls hanging from his belt. He is quite masculine in his sills as great warrior. Also, Okonkwo works hard. He is not lazy like his father was. Okonkwo has two barns filled with yams. Working hard as a farmer is a masculine trait:

Okonkwo is introduced as a great wrestler, a renowned warrior, and a hardworking member of the community. He has amassed two barns filled with yams, three wives, many children, and two titles.

Another masculine trait that Okonkwo is proud of is his abusive tendencies. He beats his three wives and children to keep them from becoming lazy and unprofitable. Okonkwo is quite masculine in his work ethic. He expects the same from his three wives and many children:

His rage, inflexibility, and fear of appearing weak like his lazy father, the musician Unoka, consistently overshadow his respect for his community.

When Ikemefuna is to be sacrificed, Okonkwo takes part in the killing, fearing he will be considered effeminate if he does not.

No doubt, Okonkwo has many masculine traits according to his Igbo division's requirements. Okonkwo fears being feminine as his father was. He strives to be as masculine as he can be:

Okonkwo strives to succeed in the traditional Igbo world, and he stands in stark contrast to Unoka, his poor, lazy father. Okonkwo is afraid of failing and appearing weak like his father. He disdains feminine activities such as playing the flute, and he gravitates to the masculine energy in Igbo society by amassing material wealth in yams.

How does Okonkwo's view of gender roles in Things Fall Apart compare with his tribe's?

Okonkwo subscribes to the traditional gender roles of Igbo society, where men possess authority and status while women are considered subservient, docile, and obedient. In Igbo society, masculinity is defined by one's performance on the battlefield or in a wrestling match. Physical prowess is admired and respected in Igbo society, along with one's success as a farmer. Accomplished men earn titles, are respected throughout their village, and possess the authority to make political decisions. In Igbo society, polygamy is also commonplace and masculinity is defined by the number of wives a man possesses. Women are objectified in Umuofia, treated as possessions, and are physically and verbally abused by their husbands.

Although Okonkwo embodies the Igbo perception of masculinity, he is significantly more violent, callous, and aggressive than most men. Growing up, Okonkwo resented his father Unoka for being a lazy debtor and went out of his way to become a completely different person than him. Okonkwo develops into a hostile, rigid man, who fears being viewed as effeminate. Despite his cold, domineering personality, Okonkwo is respected and admired throughout Umuofia and even holds two titles. Unlike Obierika or the other respected elders of Umuofia, Okonkwo is extremely insecure and offends people by lashing out and acting violent, which eventually leads to his demise. While Okonkwo embodies the traditional masculine traits of Igbo society, his overbearing, aggressive personality makes him different from his peers.

How do Okonkwo and Unoka discuss power and masculinity in Things Fall Apart?

As you work on writing this scene, your primary focus should be the contrast in beliefs and actions of the two men and the way Okonkwo resents his father. You might want to frame the scene as a dream vision in which Okonkwo, shortly after his father's death, converses with Unoka's spirit in a dream. 

The beginning of the conversation might be Okonkwo talking about his lack of inheritance and how his father's debts and lack of title have made life difficult for his family even after his death. Next, Okonkwo should accuse his father of not being a good man and failing to live up to the standards of masculinity.

As a spirit, Unoka should display a sort of wisdom and self knowledge that he might not have had in life. He should admit that he lacked physical strength and the sort of assertiveness and aggressiveness admired in the warlike Igbo society. He should acknowledge that he is quite different from his son and that he understands his son's perspective. You might quote the following passage:

Even as a little boy [Okonkwo] had resented his father's failure and weakness.... And so Okonkwo was ruled by one passion-- to hate everything that his father Unoka had loved. One of those things was gentleness and another was idleness.

Nonetheless, Unoka might point out that his aversion to war and dislike of the sight of blood, although despised in his society, did not mean that he was a failure as a man, but rather that Igbo notions of masculinity, especially as understood by Okonkwo, are limiting.

Unoka might briefly play the flute in the scene and point out that his flute playing brought peace and contentment to himself and joy to his community. Although his buying wine and entertaining left him poor, it also brought happiness. He would argue that his lack of interest in material possessions, generosity, peacefulness, and dedication to bringing pleasure to the village even in the face of disapproval were a different kind of strength, and that Okonkwo's obsession with power and material goods was a weakness. 

Unoka might also point out that Igbo tradition emphasizes a balance between the masculine and feminine in each person and that it is precisely Okonkwo's rejection of the feminine that leads to his conflict with the Earth Goddess. He would argue that within each person, masculine and feminine need to be in balance. 

Another major difference between the two men was 

[…] he [Okonkwo] was not afraid of war. He was a man of action, a man of war. Unlike his father he could stand the look of blood. In Umuofia’s latest war he was the first to bring home a human head. 

In the scene you are writing, you could have Okonkwo boast of this. Unoka might respond by saying that it is this hypermasculinity and aggressiveness that lead Okonkwo eventually to harm his own family. If Unoka has in some sense failed by lacking the warrior spirit, Okonkwo fails by possessing it in too great measure. The dialogue could conclude with Unoka talking with the wisdom he has gained in the spirit world about the need for a balance within every person of the strong and the gentle, the artistic and the practical, happiness and striving, and masculine and feminine.