Halina Bujak

Halina Bujak is a Catholic woman who worked at Morris Selbst’s dry cleaning shop. When Woody is fourteen, Morris leaves his family to live with Halina, and they spend over forty years together as a couple, despite Halina being married to someone else. Among all the relatives Woody takes to Disney World, Halina enjoys it the most, especially the Hall of Presidents.

Mitosh Bujak

Mitosh, Halina’s son, who is Morris Selbst’s long-term partner, is mentioned just once in the story. He is an organist at the Stadium for basketball and hockey games.

Helen

Helen is Woody Selbst’s mistress, referred to as his “wife de facto.” Woody sets aside Friday nights in his busy schedule to be with Helen.

Hjordis

Hjordis is the housekeeper for Mrs. Skoglund, known for her tough and suspicious nature. She is hesitant to see any good in others and is particularly reluctant to let Morris Selbst into the house, even in bad weather. When Woody leaves the Skoglund house, he asks Hjordis to call the local YMCA, where her cousin works, to arrange a room for Morris and himself. She complies, albeit reluctantly, feeling exploited by people she dislikes.

Aunt Rebecca Kovner

Aunt Rebecca Kovner, Woody’s aunt, is his mother’s sister. She is married to the Reverend Doctor Kovner, and together they focus on converting people to Christianity, including Woody, his mother, and his sisters. While at the seminary, Woody works under Aunt Rebecca at a soup kitchen for the poor, where he takes food he doesn’t need out of spite.

Reverend Doctor Kovner

Reverend Doctor Kovner, Woody’s mother’s brother-in-law, is deeply involved in converting people to Christianity. He and Morris Selbst harbor mutual disdain for each other. Morris accuses Kovner of converting Jewish women by making them fall in love with him.

Mother

Woody’s mother, whose name is not mentioned, is converted to Christianity by her sister, Aunt Rebecca Kovner, and her brother-in-law. She is a self-important woman whose strict piety drives her husband, Morris, to leave her. Over the next fifty years, up to the time of this story, she resides with her two daughters. Woody accuses her of spoiling them, making them fat and irrational, and being disconnected from reality.

Pop

See Morris Selbst

Joanna Selbst

Woody’s sister, Joanna Selbst, struggles with depression and is mentally unstable.

Morris Selbst

Morris Selbst, who began living on the streets of Liverpool, England, at twelve, arrived in the United States at sixteen by sneaking into the country after jumping ship in Brooklyn. He never creates an official identity in America and spends his life relying on illegal and semi-legal activities for survival. In his forties, he leaves his wife and three children to live with Halina, one of his employees, staying with her for over forty years until his passing. Known as "Pop" to Woody, Morris is a gambler, cheat, and thief who feels justified in his actions. When he approaches Woody for help regarding his mistress, Halina, Woody doubts his sincerity, which proves to be accurate. Pop promises to return a silver dish if Mrs. Skoglund gives him money, but after receiving it, he steals the dish anyway and lectures Woody on how religious people exploit him and deserve their fate.

Paula Selbst

Woody's sister, Paula Selbst, is a joyful yet mentally unstable character.

Woody Selbst

The narrative centers on Woody Selbst, a sixty-year-old tile contractor based in Chicago. As the anchor of his extended family, he provides support to many around him. Although living alone, he maintains a relationship with his girlfriend, Helen, whom he visits every Friday night. On Fridays, he...