Same Kind of Different As Me

by Ron Hall

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Chapter 14 Summary

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When Ron Hall is thirty-two, he buys a $275,000 house in an upscale section of Fort Worth and his Mercedes sits proudly in the driveway. His art business is thriving, and the Halls begin to live a high-society life. As Hall builds his business, Deborah plays the role of his supportive wife.

They attend expensive charity events, spending outrageous sums on Deborah’s dresses and the events themselves, as well as the donations Hall makes in paintings or gift certificates; he hopes his generosity will generate some business. Deborah thinks it would be better just to write a check directly to the charities, as the money is typically wasted on things that do not matter and Hall has not seen any business profits from his spending.

Hall travels to Paris, Tokyo, Hong Kong, and Florence to buy and sell expensive art. He also visits New York every month and that is where he meets his business partner, Michael Altman.  In 1986 the Halls move to Dallas, confident that they will be even more successful in a bigger city. They purchase a perfectly good million dollar home but tear it down to build another, painted to compliment Hall’s red Jaguar convertible parked in the driveway. Women in their neighborhood regularly spend more than $200,000 a year on clothes; while Hall would have been happy for Deborah to do the same, she is appalled at the wastefulness of such folly.

The Hall children attend public school. Regan decries wealth and prefers clothes from the Salvation Army. She wants to be a freedom fighter in South Africa. Carson is a young man with a heart toward God; in high school he is an all-state wrestler and a “model child.”

Hall travels more and spends more, changing suits and cars whenever he gets bored—which is often. Deborah, on the other hand, begins to pursue spiritual endeavors. While Hall dedicates his life to making money, impressing billionaires, and sitting briefly in a pew on Sundays, Deborah spends her time volunteering and praying for the needy. His passion is fame and success; her passion is to know God. Before long, they are pursuing their separate loves but not each other.

On a business trip in 1988, Hall meets a beautiful California painter and they have a brief affair. At the time, Hall thought Deborah loved God and their children but not him; Deborah thought Hall loved art and money but not her. The artist is only interested in how Hall can further her career; still, if Hall had not been with her, it would have been someone else because he seeks a way out of his situation. For several years, Hall secretly wants Deborah to divorce him because he is too concerned about his image to divorce her.

Hall eventually, and under duress from his friends, confesses the affair to Deborah and blames her for his infidelity: her disinterest in him drove him to another woman who accepts him as he is. Deborah is furious, and the next day the Halls go to their pastor’s office “airing their garbage.” What they discover is that neither is quite ready to end the marriage and they agree to try to salvage it.

That night, Deborah asks for the painter’s phone number; Hall is appalled but gives it to her. Deborah tells the other woman that she does not blame her for the affair, taking responsibility for not being the wife Hall needs. She asks the woman’s forgiveness and hopes the artist finds someone who will love and honor her.

This display of grace stuns Hall. When Deborah says they should go to counseling for a few months, forgives him, and promises never to mention the incident again, Hall quickly agrees.  

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