In the essay “To Show and to Tell,” Phillip Lopate explores numerous dimensions of using “I” in personal essays and memoirs. He states that the author’s responsibility is to picture clearly the person who is speaking. This requires the author “to build herself into a character.” In doing so, the biggest challenge the writerwill face is being honest—both with themselves and their audience.

Lopate includes comments on characterization by E. M. Forster and Stephen Greenblatt regarding distinctions between “flat, round, transparent, [and] opaque” characters. He argues that the author must offer the reader people who behave plausibly but are also “free-willed” so they will be both intriguing and surprising.

The author’s priority should be to acquire some distance from herself (Lopate’s preferred pronoun). He means that the author should not be defensive about anticipated attacks. This type of distance demands neither overestimating nor underestimating oneself.

A useful first step is to analyze and present one’s “quirks” or “idiosyncracies.” Doing so helps establish credibility by not appearing as an average “regular Joe.” It is important to resist the tendency toward conformity.

One difficulty in creating a compelling character out of oneself, therefore, is overcoming the suspicion that one is “common as dirt.” Lopate recommends dramatizing oneself. This means highlighting distinctive features in one’s personality, but not inventing traits. Furthermore, the personal essay writer should include conflict, whether internal or external, much as the fiction writer does.

As one attempts to craft this character, Lopate believes that the primary difficulty lies in honesty. He strongly advocates for

the emotional preparedness and the generosity … to be honest and open to exposure.

This kind of openness demands that the writer abandon shame, which could lead them to emphasize being either “so weird” or “so boring.” That others won’t want to read about them.