Marriage Is a Private Affair Cover Image

Marriage Is a Private Affair

by Chinua Achebe

Start Free Trial

Discussion Topic

Cultural relevance and inter-cultural marriages in "Marriage is a Private Affair"

Summary:

In "Marriage is a Private Affair," cultural relevance and inter-cultural marriages are central themes. The story highlights the conflict between traditional customs and modern practices through the relationship between Nnaemeka and Nene. Their inter-cultural marriage challenges societal norms, emphasizing the difficulties and eventual acceptance that can arise when different cultural values intersect in personal relationships.

Expert Answers

An illustration of the letter 'A' in a speech bubbles

Assess the cultural relevance of "Marriage is a Private Affair."

The original question had to be edited.  I would suggest that the cultural relevance of Achebe's story lies in how there is a fundamental changing of social perception regarding institutions such as marriage.  The fact that Okeke is resistant to change and does whatever he can to ensure that his son and his daughter in law are not happy is almost secondary to how they pursue happiness.  Nnaemeka is not elated at how he is disappointing his father.  However, "marriage is a private affair" and is something that he pursues any way.  The cultural boundaries are changing in how the young do believe in marriage for love and not out of duty or misplaced responsibility.  It is in this where there is a definite cultural relevance to the story.  Should the older generation wish to remain steadfast in their ways and refuse to adopt the elements of social change, the...

Unlock
This Answer Now

Start your 48-hour free trial and get ahead in class. Boost your grades with access to expert answers and top-tier study guides. Thousands of students are already mastering their assignments—don't miss out. Cancel anytime.

Get 48 Hours Free Access

result will be alienation and isolation.  Okeke is hit with immediate grief and regret that he has lost time with his son and grandsons.  

For her part, Nene shows that she is not impacted with Okeke's coarse and cruel rejection.  She is steadfast in her own sense of being as a modern woman who wishes to make a life for her family.  In her resilience and in Okeke's regret, one sees how the story is culturally relevant for a changing world where young people are able to envision what can and should be as opposed to merely conforming to what is.

Approved by eNotes Editorial
An illustration of the letter 'A' in a speech bubbles

Discuss inter-cultural marriages in the context of "Marriage is a Private Affair".

I am sure that you are well aware that this brilliant short story deals with intercultural marriages in a radically different context than India. Achebe's fiction focuses on Nigeria and one young man's decision to marry out of his Ibo tribe and the catastrophic impact that this has on his relationship with his father. Achebe in this story essentially contrasts two views about marriage, one that is older and traditional, which states that marriage is not a private affair and is the responsibility of the entire tribe, and one that is more modern which argues, as the title says, that marriage is a private affair and is the choice and decision only of those involved. The way that Nnaemeka's father shuns his son for so long because of his decision to marry outside of the tribe shows how powerful concepts such as tribe and caste still are in various parts of the world, and the very real sacrifices that people make who chose to ignore these forces.

However, the overwhelming message of the story is the way in which holding on to strict notions such as tribal identity and caste in this area can actualy be profoundly damaging to us as we miss out on relationships because of the way in which we cling on to antiquated notions. Consider how the father responds when he finds out about the existence of his grandchildren:

How could he shut his door against them? By a curious mental process he imagined them standing, sad and forsaken, under the harsh angry weather--shut out of his house.

That night he hardly slept, from remorse--and a vague fear that he might die without making it up to them.

The cost of shunning your son because of his choice of marriage partner is made staggeringly clear, as the father is left desperately regretting the time he has wasted which he could have spent with his grandchildren.

Approved by eNotes Editorial