at the local university, reading the books she left behind after dying while giving birth to him. This fact seems to be another problem between father and son, and Amir believes Baba blames him for the death of his wife--his "beautful princess." Baba spends little time with Amir, preferring the solitude of his smoking room or sharing in conversations with Rahim Khan. Although "not an impatient man," Baba has little patience with Amir. He cares little for Amir's school victories inSherjangi, "the Battle of the Poems";

Real men didn't read poetry--and God forbid they should ever write it.  (Chapter Three)

Instead, they play soccer, but Amir is "pathetic," and Baba sees that his son cares little for the sport, either as a player or spectator. Baba is "disgusted" when Amir becomes sickened by a death at a Buzkashi tournament; he believes "there is something missing in that boy" when he reveals to Rahim Khan about witnessing examples of Amir's cowardice and being defended by Hassan. Baba refuses to even glance at the short story of which Amir is so proud to have written, one which is applauded by both Hassan and Rahim Khan.

Of course, Amir does give Baba some fuel for his reasoning. Amir lies and cries and refuses to stand up for himself when other boys pick on him and Hassan. He is jealous of Baba's attentions to Hassan and treats the Hazara boy as a servant and not a friend. He conspires to rid the household of Hassan, and he eventually succeeds. Baba does comes to respect his son once he grows into adulthood in California; Baba mellows in America, recognizing that their new life is different, and that Amir's interest in writing and teaching will better serve him there. Baba is far from a perfect father, but he does try to serve as an example for his son; as for Amir, he is simply unable to scale the lofty mountain of a man that Baba has become, and both of them sense failure because of it.

Baba's Positive Attributes as a father:

Baba is a successful businessman in Kabul and provides Amir with a luxurious life. As a child, Amir does not grow up needy and lives a relatively comfortable life in Baba's beautiful home. Amir is also proud of his father's Mustang and is one of the wealthiest children in his neighborhood.

Baba is also a positive role model for Amir. Baba is a generous, respected man throughout the city and even constructs an orphanage for less fortunate children. Baba also demonstrates courage in the face of adversity by valiantly challenging a Russian soldier, who attempts to rape a woman at a checkpoint.

Baba sacrifices everything he has worked for in life by leaving Kabul during the Russian occupation. Baba decides to flee Afghanistan in order to give Amir a new start in America. In America, Baba works hard to provide for his son and even buys Amir his first car.

Baba's Negative Attributes as a father:

Baba is distant and unaffectionate towards Amir. He pays little attention to his son and often ignores his interests. Baba prefers Hassan over Amir and does not spend much quality time with Amir as a child.

Baba does not support Amir's dream to become a writer and believes that his son should go to college to become a lawyer or doctor.

Baba refuses to tell Amir that Hassan is his half-brother, which is significant information that would have altered how Amir perceives Hassan.

Postive Assertions:

1. Baba sets good example for Amir in that he is generous to others and will stand up for the oppressed (i.e., his brazen confrontation with the Soviet soldier as he and Amir try to escape from Afghanistan).

2. In America, Baba sacrifices his own desires for Amir's well being.  Baba longs for Afghanistan but knows that Amir is thriving in America.  He also drives a rattletrap and buys Amir a better car.

3. At the end of his life, Baba makes peace with what Amir and has chosen for a career and gives his blessing by listening to his stories for once.

Negative Assertions:

1. Baba keeps the most important truth from Amir and even takes it with him to his grave--the truth that Hassan is Amir's half brother.

2. Baba's harsh and distant treatment of Amir causes him to seek Baba's approval at any cost, even the betrayal of his friend.

3. Baba allows his best friend and business partner to be more of a parent to Amir than he is because he is so wrapped up in himself and his own guilt.

A healthy father-son relationship is built on trust, since the older father is in a position of power and authority over the younger son. Without trust, the essential bond can only extend as far as the dishonesty lasts; when the truth comes out, there can be only bad feelings. In The Kite Runner, Baba conceals his parentage of Hassan from Amir both for cultural reasons and because he doesn't want Amir to feel jealous of Hassan. When Amir finds out, many years later, his reaction shows how much of his life the broken trust affects:

How could he have lied to me all those years? To Hassan? He had sat me on his lap when I was little, looked me straight in the eyes, and said, There is only one sin. And that is theft... When you tell a lie, you steal someone’s right to the truth. Hadn’t he said those words to me? And now, fifteen years after I’d buried him, I was learning that Baba had been a thief. And a thief of the worst kind, because the things he’d stolen had been sacred: from me the right to know I had a brother, from Hassan his identity, and from Ali his honor.
(Hosseini, The Kite Runner, Google Books)

Because of this essential lie, Baba's relationship with Amir was always strained; even though Baba's lessons stayed with Amir for his entire life, and even though he found his father admirable in many ways, the revelation of a lie held throughout his entire life taints all of his memories and shows just how much and how deeply Baba hid -- both from Amir, and from himself.