Part 2, Section 4 Summary
Turner had used too much of his energy on others; now all he has left is the ability to mark his progress by the plodding of his boots on the ground. His impediments—his thirst, a blister on his foot, the shrapnel causing an infection—could not be allowed to outweigh his reasons to keep moving. He thinks about Cecilia and their few stolen moments of sensuality; he thinks about her as he saw her in a variety of settings before his life changed so dramatically. It is as if he has two lives, one before the twins ran away and one after, the latter including prison and war and the commonplace sight of the dead and dying. The memories were almost bleached colorless with the passage of time and with overuse; now, however, there is something new with which to occupy his mind and carry him forward through his pain.
The possibility of redemption, of freedom from an old condemnation, is enough to remind him of how much he has shriveled in these past years. The prospect is one of “rebirth, a triumphant return,” an opportunity to become a man who is once again free to pursue whatever simple pleasures he desires. He will not spend his energy shunning those who had shunned him or collecting apologies from those who had so easily believed the worst. Instead, he will simply resume his life. He might reapply to medical school, and if Cecilia reconciles with her family he will find a way to be cordial from a distance, though Emily had “pursued his prosecution with a strange ferocity” and Jack had simply walked away when he could have helped.
As he walks through the unmoving convoy, stepping over the dead and wounded, Turner contemplates how he will deal with Briony once he is exonerated. He knows the possibility of absolution is for her, not for him. It is true she was a child in 1935, but she had been fiercely determined and consistently adamant in her accusations. Though he knows it is foolish to hate either Briony or Danny Hardman, he does. Turner has had plenty of time to think about the girl’s motives, and he keeps coming back to a June day in 1932 when Briony was about ten years old. He was nineteen and they went to the weir for swimming lessons he had started with her a year earlier. After the lesson, Turner stepped away from the clearing to change his wet clothes. When he returned to the weir, the young girl was standing on the edge of the water. She asked him if he would save her if she jumped in, and of course he said he would. As he turned away from her for a moment, Briony jumped into the weir and disappeared.
Turner was frantic at losing his charge and jumped in, fully dressed, and pulled her to the surface. Briony was holding her breath, and Turner was furious at the girl’s apparent frivolous actions. She explained, in a matter-of-fact way, that she loved him and was testing his love. Turner was not moved by her declaration, and his life moved on from there with no further declarations or even references to the incident over the next few years—until that night. He recalls her standing so oddly on the bridge, waiting, ready to take his letter for Cecilia but determined to read it on her own before delivering it. He thinks that when Briony saw that he did not love her, read it in his own handwriting, her hopes and dreams came crashing down around her. Even worse, she then caught him in the library with her sister. From there, the heartbroken girl took extraordinary measures and used the twins’ disappearance and the assault on Lola as an opportunity for revenge. How deep must have been her rancor to accuse him so easily and consistently all the way to prison. He will revel in his exoneration, but he will never forgive Briony for what she did.
Get Ahead with eNotes
Start your 48-hour free trial to access everything you need to rise to the top of the class. Enjoy expert answers and study guides ad-free and take your learning to the next level.
Already a member? Log in here.