In "The Acharnians," Dicaeopolis is a man exhausted by war, yearning for peace while caught in the tedious political machinations of Athens. Amidst the absurdity of pompous ambassadors and fractious assemblies, he devises a personal escape, crafting his own private truce. His journey through satire exposes the futility of conflict and extols the simple pleasures of peace.

The Waiting Game

As Dicaeopolis finds himself waiting impatiently for the Athenian assembly to begin, he idly doodles in the dust and tugs at his hair, all the while yearning for peace. With a resolve to disrupt any agenda that doesn't focus on ending hostilities with Sparta, he's ready to heckle the speakers. When the assembly finally gathers, his ally, Amphitheus, laments the pangs of hunger brought on by the war diet. Dicaeopolis steps in just in time to save Amphitheus from being arrested.

Absurd Allegiances

The assembly listens to one grandiose speech after another from ambassadors representing Athens's allies. Dicaeopolis, wise to the charade, mocks these claims as he knows the Peloponnesian War is draining them all. The comedy peaks when the last ambassador introduces a ragtag group of poorly dressed soldiers as a mighty Thracian force sent to aid in the war effort. Seizing the opportunity, Dicaeopolis ends the assembly by claiming he felt a raindrop, knowing this meager pretext would suffice to disperse them.

Crafting Personal Peace

Unable to influence the larger peace, Dicaeopolis decides to secure his own private accord. Amphitheus, acting as his envoy, returns with three wines, symbolic peace offerings from the enemy: one five-year, another ten-year, and a third thirty-year old. The first two taste dreadful, but the last one is divine, evoking the essence of ambrosia and nectar. Dicaeopolis joyfully imbibes the thirty-year wine, proclaiming his own long-lasting peace. News of this traitorous act reaches the Acharnians, whose own vineyards have been ravaged, and they follow Amphitheus to confront Dicaeopolis just as he emerges from his home to offer a prayer to Bacchus in gratitude for the peace that allows a return to normalcy. Despite his prayers, the Acharnians begin pelting him with stones as he desperately tries to convince them of the benefits of peace. Facing further aggression, Dicaeopolis grabs a covered basket of coals, declaring it to be an Acharnian child and threatening harm unless he's allowed to make his case. When they concede, he cheekily requests to don appropriate attire for his speech.

A Borrowed Costume

Dicaeopolis seeks out Euripides, the renowned playwright, to borrow the costume of Telephus, one of his most pitiable characters. Euripides, engrossed in writing a new play, is not pleased to be interrupted. Nonetheless, Dicaeopolis uses the occasion to jest about the playwright's tragic heroes and the humble origins of his mother as a vegetable vendor. Reluctantly, Euripides hands over the costume, eager to rid himself of the nuisance.

A Divided Chorus

Dicaeopolis's impassioned speech advocating for peace resonates deeply with the Acharnians, leaving the chorus split. Just then, Lamachus, a general clad in full regalia, arrives proclaiming his unwavering commitment to perpetual war against Sparta and its allies. In contrast, Dicaeopolis boldly declares his marketplace open to all foes of Athens, excluding only Lamachus.

Marketplace Bartering

Not long after, a famished Megarian enters Dicaeopolis’s market with his two daughters, who have agreed that the prospect of being sold is preferable to starvation. Disguising them as pigs with snouts and hooves, he offers them as sacrificial sows to Aphrodite. Aware of the ruse, Dicaeopolis nevertheless accepts them in exchange for garlic and salt. The next merchant is a rotund, prosperous Boeotian with a bounty of game, livestock,...