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What are the tensions in Winston's life in 1984?

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Winston's life in 1984 is filled with tension due to living under a totalitarian regime where freedom of thought is suppressed. The omnipresent threat of the Thought Police creates constant fear of punishment for any "heresy" against Big Brother. He is haunted by memories of his mother and sister and feels isolated without a partner. His affair with Julia exacerbates his fear of discovery. Additionally, his relationships with others, like Syme and Parsons, are fraught with mistrust and fear.

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Winston's whole life is one of tension. The source of this, in a totalitarian society, is not exactly that there are explicit laws against freedom of activity. It is rather, as Winston observes, that nothing is actually illegal because there are no laws. There is an overriding awareness that one has absolutely no freedom, even of thought, though nothing about this is ever directly stated by the regime. For all Outer Party members such as Winston, the assumption is that the Thought Police are omniscient and that any kind of "heresy" against Big Brother and the Party, even if it's never been openly expressed, will be punished with torture and death. Even before Winston has begun his diary and written DOWN WITH BIG BROTHER, he knows he is doomed.

The secondary tensions in Winston's life are mostly an outgrowth of this primary fear of discovery, punishment, and death. But...

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Winston is also haunted by the memory of his mother and sister, and his abuse that caused them to leave him when he was a youth. BeforeJulia, the absence of a woman in his life exacerbates his isolation and his frustrated, resentful attitude. But the affair with Julia, he knows, simply compounds the "crimes" he has already committed. His interactions with others, in general, are filled with additional tension because his neighbors and associates are people he either dislikes or fears. Though he enjoys the company of Syme on an intellectual level and admires Syme for his intelligence, Winston also fears him because Syme is a fanatical adherent of the Party and would betray Winston instantly if he suspected him of thoughtcrime. (Syme himself, however, ends up vaporized.) Parsons, though seemingly harmless and himself eventually arrested for thoughtcrime, is tiresome and annoying to Winston in his own dull-witted party fanaticism. So there is basically nothing positive in Winston's life, which is overwhelmed by tension and fear from start to finish.

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To me, the major tension in his life is between what he wants to be, on the one hand, and what he has to be in order to stay alive, on the other.

Winston wants desperately to be an individual.  He wants to have his own thoughts and his own memories.  But he lives in a society where such things are impossible (or at least completely forbidden).  This causes the central tension in his life.

I suppose you could say that another tension is between his desire to rebel and his understanding that rebellion is futile.  He knows from the beginning that he's doomed, but he can't help himself and keeps rebelling.

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