Why are men so complicated when it comes to expressing their feelings? (no offense)

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I have to say, I completely agree with Frizzyperm.  The problem you have posed may have less to do with the men or the women individually, and more to do with the differences in how every individual communicates.  As a woman, I've met plenty of women who drive me insane with their inability to express how they really feel (my mother in law comes to mind), and just as many men who are excellent at verbal expression of what's on their mind.

Perhaps what you should really be looking at is the communication break down between yourself and the person (people) in question.  I very often find that a significant difference in intelligence is often a culprit.  I'm not saying this to sound trite, nor smarmy.  Differences in intelligence often manifest themselves in insecurity, which very often impedes communication more than simply being "unable to express" feelings.

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While I may have no answers to this question, I can say that such a question must be strongly qualified. Rather than "Why do men ...?" one must ask "Why do American men ...?" or "Why do Western nations' men ...?" There is no consensus that Indian and Bolivian and Japanese etc men have a similar difficulty with expressing feelings (they may or may not, but there is no body of research that indicates either way).

Additionally, you must ask "Why do men of the 21st century ...?" or "Why did men of the 20th century ...?" Further, unless you wish to prove that men like Dickens, Keats, Byron, Shakespeare, Spenser, Chaucer were aberrations, it is clear that Western men have not always found it difficult to express feelings.

In order to get your answer, you will need to look not to contemporary psychology nor to one single group of contemporary men, but to history and to many groups of contemporary men from Borneo to Norway and from Japan to Cairo to Mexico City.

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I'd answer three reasons: partially anthropological, partially cultural and partially stereotypical. Evolutionarily speaking, it helped that men focused on strength and activities that need strength. Our culture also reinforces gender stereotypes, encouraging girls to share their feelings while telling boys to be tough. Some of it is just stereotype.
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Why are men so complicated when it comes to expressing their feelings? (no offense)

Why are men so complicated when it comes to expressing their feelings? (no offense)

None taken.

#3 and #2 make great points. There are many feelings which men can express in a better way than women and some that women seem to express in a better way. A lot of it is to do with culture. For example it would be fine if a woman cries to express grief, but men and supposed to be emotionally stronger and be able to bear it. Women on the other hand would not find it easy to show anger due to their cultural upbringing.

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Speaking as a man, I would advise you to be wary of generalisations and sterotypes. I don't necessarily think that this statement can be applied to every single male in the world. I also can see the truth of #3. Maybe, to be controversial, we have no problems expressing our emotions at all, but women express them too much in an Oprah-style splurge of emotions, thus women think that men can't express emotions!

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I recently had this conversation with a man. In reality, as brought to my attention, men do not have trouble expressing their emotions. They express their emotions just fine. Think about when a man gets angry. He, typically, has no problem showing those emotions. Unfortunately, the generalization comes into place given men's lack of more feminine emotions: sadness and love.

Therefore, men do not have trouble expressing their emotions, just the ones women deem necessary.

Sorry ladies! Emotions are not limited to only the ones we want to see.

Outside of that, wannam provides a wonderful psychological explanation.

 

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Men tend to have more difficulty expressing emotions than women for two main reasons. First, it is often culturally unacceptable. As an American, we often see emotional men criticized or put down for expressing their feelings openly. Culturally men have been taught to be stronger, not cry, etc. For years, we have raised boys to fill a certain cultural role which makes it difficult for them to express emotion. The other reason has more to do with biology than culture. Men actually have a different brain structure than women. Scientist have found that subtle differences in particular areas of the brain cause men to think differently than women. Men and women literally process certain types of information in different ways. It is currently believed that men may have more difficulty expressing emotion because of these physical aspects of the brain.
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