What does this statement from "Road from Home" mean? "The longer I stayed in Azizya, the older I got, the less I liked my life".
Varon makes this statement after returning to her hometown, having survived the deportation and massacres faced by the Armenian population during World War I. Varon had been about 8 years old when she left with her family; when she returns she is about 12. Her parents and all her siblings have died.
At first Varon is happy to be back in the town where she grew up, but after awhile she becomes unhappy with her life there. Part of the reason is because she is no longer a child. Her parents are not there to shelter her from life's harshness, and as she gets older she becomes more and more aware of what is going on around her. Also, she has seen more of the world during her years of forced wandering, and now has something with which to compare her life. To Varon, "everything seemed shabby and dirty. Had it looked this way when I lived here? It seemed so backward now, and the people were mean-looking and forlorn" (Chapter 14). Grandma attributes the differences to the war, but in reality, things have changed in Azizya, especially in the relationship between the Turks and Armenians. Before the war, the two groups had lived in mutual tolerance, but now, as Papa had observed while the family was in exile, "the Turk and the Armenian can never be friends again", and those who return to Azizya must face "an obliterated past and an unknown future" (Chapter 10).