What are some morals of To All The Boys I've Loved Before?

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While To All the Boys I've Loved Before does not have a distinct, explicit "moral" (morals are typically associated with fables, parables, or folktales), readers can absolutely draw lessons from its major themes.

One major theme in the novel is honesty. Rather than being honest about her feelings, Lara Jean keeps them literally "boxed up" in her hat box full of letters. Rather than being honest about her feelings, Kitty secretly sends Lara Jean's letters. Lies flood the school about Lara Jean and Peter's relationship (and what did or did not happen on the ski trip), and Peter does nothing to dispel the rumors. All of these examples of dishonesty lead to problems, frustrations, and heartbreak for the novel's characters. This can easily lead the reader to learn the importance of honesty, which could certainly be considered a "moral" of the story.

Similarly, the novel teaches readers to bravely pursue love. So much drama and heartache could have been avoided if Lara Jean had actually acted on her feelings rather than hiding behind her unsent love letters. If she had acted, she could have likely discovered "true" love much sooner instead of living through her somewhat immature personal fantasies. If any of the characters had just gone after what (and who) they wanted in a relationship openly and honestly, there could have avoided a lot of conflict.

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Arguably, the main moral of the story is that honesty is always the best policy. Over the course of the book it becomes clear that most of the many misunderstandings that arise do so through people not being straightforward with each other. Lara Jean doesn't divulge her true feelings for Peter, for example. Not only that, but she tells him that she's dating someone else, which is untrue.

As for Peter, he's not exactly blameless: rumors have been going round that he and Lara Jean had sex during the recent school ski trip. These rumors are completely false, but Peter does nothing to dispel them.

Eventually, the two lovebirds are reconciled and all their silly little misunderstandings cleared up, but this was by no means an inevitable outcome. Because of all the dishonesty, the lies, and the dissimulation, a promising relationship could just as easily have been wrecked for good.

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Throughout To All The Boys I've Loved Before by Jenny Han, main character Lara-Jean prefers to keep her romantic life in the fantasy world. Fascinated by romance novels, she's no stranger to love stories, but when it comes to her real-life crushes, she has a debilitating fear of what will happen if she tells them how she really feels. She is afraid of their reaction and of the possibility that they won't reciprocate. Her feelings end up being exposed anyway, though not by choice.

Of course, throughout the novel, she does not have to tell her fake boyfriend Peter how she really feels to have her feelings reciprocated. Through their fake relationship, she slowly learns how it feels to be loved, without even realizing it at the time. Only when she rereads all the little notes that Peter left her does she realize that she had, in fact, been written love letters.

Lara-Jean's story provides the reader with the main moral that everyone is deserving of love. It also shows us that you will never know until you try. After all, Lara-Jean and Peter would never have fallen in love if her sister hadn't sent out her secret love letters, and in hindsight, Lara-Jean realizes this.

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