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WEDDING Do you prefer a big wedding party or a small one? discuss about advantages and disadvantages of each one.

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litteacher8 eNotes educator | Certified Educator

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The biggest disadvantage of a big wedding is that it is expensive and very complicated. A lot can go wrong, the more complicated the wedding is. I don't really see too many advantages in having such a big expensive wedding other than to impress other people. Going into debt for your wedding, or spending all of your savings, does not make sense to me.

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besure77 eNotes educator | Certified Educator

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Well, I have had one of each. The big wedding was very nice but very tiring. At the end of the day I was ready to collapse. There is also a lot of stress involved with big weddings because there are many things to plan and a lot of money is spent. My second wedding was a small and simple one. We actually were married out of state and told friends and family that they were more than welcome to come but they were under no obligation to do so. There was little stress involved. I definitely liked the smaller wedding better.

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Karen P.L. Hardison eNotes educator | Certified Educator

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Sometime in the late 1960 and early 1970s, Designer Brand Names became the aspired and (seemingly) necessary accompaniment to the life of ordinary working class Americans, who were now getting posh Vidal Sassoon hair cuts and wearing jeans that said something much more that Levi and frequenting lavish vacation spots once reserved for the famous and wealth. This social status requirement of displaying signs of pomp that had previously attached only to the upper social circles also affected weddings and receptions radically changing their tone and objective. This was helped along by Hollywood movies that "reflected life" and thereby led life further along, helped out from time to time by lines such as Renee Zellweger's innocent question "Can this be MY day?" in The Bachelor (1999), with Chris O'Donnell.

As a result, weddings of average working class people have metamorphosed into something new and different from what they were in previous decades. Hence the contemporary question about monster, slightly irrational weddings--and the new phenomenon of "Bridzillas" who echo Renee Zellweger to heavens: "This is supposed to be MY day!!!" Me? I advocate weddings that join the families and friends of a couple together to witness their oaths of love and devotion to each other. The size of the wedding, then is determined by the financial ability to host loved ones, in a descending order of importance, at the wed-ding of two true hearts. The size of the wedding party, then, would be similarly decided by financial ability to honor your friends by inviting them to attend you as your legal witnesses at your wed-ding ceremony. If you have much wealth, then invite the world and regale yourself with attendants and ladies-in-waiting. If you're a working person from a working family, look at your budget.

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leabc eNotes educator | Certified Educator

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I think that a lot depends on the couple's personality.  To begrudge an extremely social couple a big wedding, would be to deny who they are.  They would want to share the moment with everyone they know and be the center of attention for a day.  As mentioned, the costs that are accrued can be astronomical.

The small wedding is perfect for the couple that is quieter, prefer to take a more low key approach to celebrations.  The down-side is that someone is bound to be hurt that they were not among the select few at the ceremony.

Another option is a 'medium-sized' wedding.  All the important people would be invited, along with those that would be upset about not receiving an invite.  You can still have the glamorous dress, sit down dinner, etc., but save a few dollars by not inviting everyone you ever met.

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clairewait eNotes educator | Certified Educator

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Everyone I know regretted the hype that went into planning a big wedding.  When all was said and done, all said "it wasn't worth the stress."

I am a huge fan of small, intimate, personal weddings.  The fact is - the day is blown way out of proportion (largely by commercialism) as it is.  This is not the biggest day of your life (sorry to burst a possible bubble) - it is simply the celebration of possibly the biggest decision of your life.  When you think about it that way, think about the people who love you the most who would be the most willing to celebrate with you.

Big weddings are often full of people the bride and groom don't even know.  Many are there just eating and drinking at the expense of the bride's father.  Intimate weddings have more meaning - are less stressful - and in the end - more memorable.

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maui1234 | Student

I had the larger wedding with 250 guests and it was grand, but my wife and I barely had time to say hi to everyone and thank them for coming before it was over.

Being young at the time of my marriage i just didn't understand a large wedding took a lot of the personal interaction with guests out of the equation. If I had it to do over again I would go with the smaller wedding.

Being in the photography scene now I think I would go with a small intimate Maui wedding on the beach. I would have around 20-25 guests of only my closest friends and family. It would be in a dream location so the whole experience would be stress free, fun and memorable for everyone involved.

teeya1777 | Student

i really don't understand the hype about big large weddings.

Marriage in the world of south Asian countries conservatives has become like shopping for goods and ultimately an additional standards of wastage.

personally i feel a generalized picture of an ultra extended members at the wedding ceremony is totally useless and more to the fact some of the doll shiny faces are the crew u haven't met before.

small weddings got its pros as well as its cons, having a neat sum of people whom u know but its looks somewhat a wicked walk due to the obvious fact of cutting 'some' of them out from ur buffet of options.

however, i vote for small weddings any day.

hani8425 | Student


Small weddings are intimate and therefore draw a much sincere and affectionate emotion among the guests and the couple. the couple can spend their most special day with their family and some other people whom are close and truly love them. small weddings are less stressing and less complicated.

  It’s better to have a simple beautiful wedding celebration than having a grand wedding which will put you into debt. But some couples decide to have a small wedding not because their budget is limited; instead they just prefer to have sumptuous wedding over a small number guest and beget more appreciation. Couple gets the chance to select over multiple venues and enjoys the privilege of customizing your own wedding according to your taste and preferences. They can also get more time to get along with their guests. Guests will then feel more comfortable and will be encouraged to get involve.

  Some of advantages of big wedding is that people who come to your wedding are guaranteed to bring you a present, and also people who are not invited or not able to come, but not that this should be a huge consideration! The biggest argument for having a large wedding is that everybody who wants to come will be invited and nobody will feel left out. You won’t feel bad for having to leave anybody out. So under the pretext of wedding you will meet whom you really miss them and there was no chance to gathering together!

As a result small weddings are definitely practical.