Vivid verbs ?Rewrite the following paragraph using as many vivid verbs as you can. When I woke up that morning, everyone else in the house was gone. I didn't hear any sounds of life. I took a...

Vivid verbs ?

Rewrite the following paragraph using as many vivid verbs as you can.

When I woke up that morning, everyone else in the house was gone. I didn't hear any sounds of life. I took a shower, put on my clothes, and went downstairs to the kitchen. I looked in the refrigerator, but there was nothing to eat except the same old thing. I took out two eggs, some bacon, and a piece of bread for toast. I also took out some orange juice. I put the eggs and bacon in the frying pan together. I quickly found out this would not work very well. Then I put the bread in the toaster and put the dial on "dark." The toast came out black. Now that I had done everything wrong, I put all the dirty dishes in the sink. I decided to go out for breakfast.

 

Expert Answers
mwestwood eNotes educator| Certified Educator

In order to revise a passage using vivid verbs, the writer wants, first of all, to eliminate all static verbs such as any forms of the verb to be.  Then, eliminate forms of the verb to have.  And, finally, remove any trite verbs or elementary verbs with more precise synonyms. Often the use of participles in place of a simple verb adds more action. Vivid verbs give life and individuality to a person's writing. While you should be able to revise on your own with the help of a good dictionary and a thesaurus, here are a few examples:

Change

went downstairs - scurried            

looked into the refrigerator - peered

I took out two eggs - I snatched two eggs from their carton trenches

the toast came out - the bread emerged in a black fog from the toaster

HINT: Copious reading will improve a person's vocabulary; there is nothing wrong with imitating some of the phrasing and word choices of good writers.

copelmat eNotes educator| Certified Educator

When I sprang up that morning, everyone else in the house had vanished. I didn't detect any sounds of life. I ran through a shower, leapt into my clothes, and bounded downstairs to the kitchen. I scanned the refrigerator, but nothing existed to eat except the same old thing. I grabbed two eggs, some bacon, and a piece of bread for toast. I also poured some orange juice. I slapped the eggs and bacon in the frying pan together. I quickly realized this would not work very well. Then I tossed the bread in the toaster and spoun the dial on "dark." The toast jumped out black. Now that I managed everything wrong, I dropped all the dirty dishes in the sink. I decided to escape for breakfast.