A statement such as "Research into ... demonstrate[s]" must be supported. In other words, you need to cite the specific research studies you have read. You should also narrow your topic so that you can adequately survey all relevant research. Since there is far to much research on violence and media for you to read for anything less than a PhD dissertation, you need to narrow your topic so that you can read the relevant research in scholarly journals, and summarize it with specific citations.
One strength is that you are making an effort to incorporate the terms used in the discipline, but at times this leads to excessive use of passive voice and several agreement errors.