The Marital Relationship in "Home Burial" Critically discuss the relationship between the husband and the wife in Frost's "Home Burial."

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The Marital Relationship in "Home Burial"

Critically discuss the relationship between the husband and the wife in Frost's "Home Burial."

  I am sure you could imagine the pain that both were going through after the death of their child.  Men and women grieve differently, which is emphasized in the poem through the man's and woman's actions and words.  Women, stereotypically, are driven by emotion and are more at ease showing emotions; whereas, men have typically been portrayed as having to stay stoic and strong for their wives.  An already strained marriage for this couple is now pushed to the breaking point because both cannot relate to each other's ways of grieving.  I do not agree with the assessment of the man's character that is mentioned above.  I merely saw him as a man who is grieving in his own way, not as someone who is callous and cold, necessarily.  The wife, understandably, is upset with the husband for digging the grave so quickly and with such apparent ease.  

I will provide a personal example of this very topic.  When my sister, who was 34 at the time, had a massive heart attack and nearly died, my parents were devastated.  They had a wonderful marriage, but my sister's near-death experience put a huge strain on them both.  My dad did not deal with this experience in the same way my mother did.  My dad found that by working out in the yard and keeping busy, he could cope with the sadness and pain he felt.  My mother did not understand this and felt he was neglecting her and her way of coping.  She wanted my father to always talk about the situation, but that was not my dad's personality or way.  He was able to take out his anger and frustration and the "Why us's?" in his yard by doing strenuous stuff that kept him busy.  Neither way of coping with heartache is wrong...just different.  

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