I love a person for a long time. I see him 3 times in a weak. I can't tell him straight what should I do that he feels me?Sometimes we talk about work and such thing just for 5 or 10 minutes. Maybe...

I love a person for a long time. I see him 3 times in a weak. I can't tell him straight what should I do that he feels me?

Sometimes we talk about work and such thing just for 5 or 10 minutes. Maybe he loves me too because when he talk to me I notice this. But I am not sure. please help me I suffer so much. everynight I cry. I like him to tell me that he loves me too. How can I draw his attention? please help me

Asked on by sadnesss

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litteacher8's profile pic

litteacher8 | High School Teacher | (Level 3) Distinguished Educator

Posted on

Communication is the key to a successful relationship. It is not easy to tell a person how you feel. However if he does feel the same way about you that you feel about him, there's no time to lose in finding out. If he doesn't, you can always just be friends.
ask996's profile pic

ask996 | High School Teacher | (Level 1) Senior Educator

Posted on

Personally, I feel if you are mature enough to be in love, if you are mature enough to be in a relationship, then you are mature enough to say, "I really enjoy the time we spend together talking. Would you like to go get coffee, a drink, a bite to eat, etc." Sometimes putting our emotions on the line is the only way we'll ever find out. Good luck.

clairewait's profile pic

clairewait | High School Teacher | (Level 1) Educator Emeritus

Posted on

Keep it casual... and don't profess your undying love right away (this tends to freak people out) - but go ahead and be straight forward - and honest.  If he shoots you down now, you won't have your heart broken nearly as badly as later when you are even more invested, and if not (which is what you hope for) - then, well, you've won.  It's a win-win.

I might go with something along these lines: "You know, we spend about 3 days a week together - and this is probably going to sound crazy, but, it never seems like enough time.  I'm really enjoying your company right now and it wouldn't hurt my feelings if we could hang out even more."

brettd's profile pic

brettd | High School Teacher | (Level 2) Educator Emeritus

Posted on

How about a cup of coffee or a soda and a long conversation?  Most people are open to that because it doesn't seem so much like a "date".  Then you can discover if you have other things in common that would make suggesting a date easier for you to do.  Who knows, he might discover he really likes you and will ask you out on his own.  Good luck!

bullgatortail's profile pic

bullgatortail | High School Teacher | (Level 1) Distinguished Educator

Posted on

Why don't you ask him out? It's perfectly acceptable for a young woman to ask a young man out on a date these days. I would try to make it something very low-key and, hopefully, something in which you know he would be interested (concert, movie, dinner, sporting event, etc.). You might have to prepare yourself for a rejection, but at least it would give you some better insight into his feelings. If he accepts, you'll know that he's interested in you. If he gives you a reasonable excuse for not going out, try again at a later date. Just take it slow and don't read too much into whatever his decision may be.

besure77's profile pic

besure77 | Middle School Teacher | (Level 1) Senior Educator

Posted on

I agree with the previous responder and you should take that advice. I think that "love" may be a word that is a bit harsh in this situation. I believe that love is something that is mutual and you really do not know how he feels about you at this time. I think your best bet is to talk to him about it. I know that it is often very hard to talk to people directly about these kinds of things but I think this may be the only way you will find out how he feels about you. Honesty is the best policy.

akannan's profile pic

Ashley Kannan | Middle School Teacher | (Level 3) Distinguished Educator

Posted on

It sounds like this is a complex situation.  I would probably suggest that speaking to close friends or family members who know either you and/ or the specific situation might help a bit more than something which is more impersonal such as enotes, a forum that is more driven by academic issues.  I think that it sounds like you have feelings for this person that might need to be explored.  I think that you might need to make sure that acting on these feelings is something whose consequence is something that can be handled or sustained by your family or social context.  For example, if your parents have a rule that you are not to date or engage in the exploration of these feelings outside of their consent, perhaps this needs to be the final word on the matter.  I am not entirely certain that you are in "love" with this other person.  You might like him "a lot" and have strong feelings for him, but "love" is something that does, as the cliches go, require time and examination.  If you think that you are able to confess your feelings of liking him "a lot" and you think this is something that can be done or sustained in your condition, there is no harm in speaking your mind.  I know this might be mortifying for you and kind of odd to do because of the potential embarrassment.  It might be something that socially you are not able to do.  However, one has to keep in mind that this is temporary, a condition that is not permanent.  If he does not share the same feelings or you cannot do so because of a family condition or otherwise, then nothing was lost and you can close this chapter and star the process of moving on with your life and feelings.  Being able to check with your family or friends, examine your situation, and assess whether this is something that can be explored might be your best option.  The advice you get from enotes outside of this might be limited in not being able to fully grasp the implications of a personal situation.

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