What are some rules for fighting fair in a marriage?

Expert Answers

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There are a number of possible rules for “fighting fair.”  Some of the most important include:

  • Give your partner the information they need.  Do not expect your spouse to figure out why you are mad.
  • Fight about the real issues.  Fights often occur over seemingly trivial issues when there are other, deeper problems that are actually causing the fights.  Address the root causes.
  • Do not bring up other fights or other shortcomings during a given fight.  In other words, if you are talking about one issue, do not suddenly bring in another issue out of the blue.
  • Do not call your partner names.
  • Discuss the issues rather than simply attacking your partner.
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