Hagar was incredibly embarrassed of having married Bram. Where in the novel are there convincing quotes about her insecurity of having married Bram and why she is embarrassed?
It is clear that Hagar felt insecure throughout her marriage to Bram. Some would argue that Bram was a pragmatic husband, but his brash indifference to Hagar's needs caused her much suffering. For example, Bram kept and nurtured bees as a hobby, despite Hagar's fear of them. The text alludes to the fact that Bram was indifferent to Hagar's dread of the insects:
A few survived, and Bram kept them for years, knowing full well they frightened me. He could plunge his hairy arms among them, even when they swarmed, and they never stung.
Bram's lack of grace and refinement also caused Hagar great embarrassment on more than one occasion. Although Bram was a good-looking man and carried himself well, his lack of social skill often alienated their acquaintances. Hagar relates that, not long after their marriage, she sensed that a new distance had developed between her and Charlotte Tappen, her best friend. Hagar remembers thinking that Bram was the cause of it, and her worst fears were confirmed during an exchange between Bram and Charlotte one day:
Charlotte smiled into Bram's face. "I must tell you—I've just heard. Our Glee Club's going to do The Messiah this year. I think that'll be marvelous, don't you? Although some people are saying it's too ambitious. What do you think?"
"I don't know nothing about it," he said. "And what's more, I don't give a good goddamn."
Here are other quotes that demonstrate how Bram contributed to Hagar's insecurities and how he embarrassed her often:
"Well listen here, Hagar, let's get one thing straight. I talk the way I talk, and i ain't likely to change now. If it's not good enough, that's too damn bad.
"You don't even try," I said.
"I don't care to, " he said. "I don't give a Christly curse how I talk, so get that through your head. It don't matter to me what your friends or your old man think."
Hagar relates that she let Bram go to town alone after the first year of their marriage. She was too embarrassed to be seen with him. Sadly, Bram raised no objections; instead, he took the opportunity to seek out his friends at the beer parlor.