custody help i frist moved in with my grandparents when i was 5 years old i am now 16 going to be 17 in two months i have been in school while liven with grandparent my grandparent get a check for...

custody help

i frist moved in with my grandparents when i was 5 years old i am now 16 going to be 17 in two months i have been in school while liven with grandparent my grandparent get a check for me  every month and i am on her ebt card my mom signed a piece of paper when i frist moved in with my grandparent givening the temporary custody now that i am 17 my mom is trying to take me from my grandparent and i was wondering if she could do that bec i still want to stay and live with my grandparents and not live with her but she still has full custody even though i have lived with my grandparetns for 12 year  can she take me from my grandparents ? i dont wanna live with her i wanna stay were i am at

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stolperia's profile pic

stolperia | (Level 1) Educator Emeritus

Posted on

I would encourage you to verify the legal regulations related to custody determination in your state as a first step. Your next steps will need to be determined once you know what the requirements are.

If you need to submit any written statement regarding your past custody arrangements and/or your wishes for custodial arrangements until you become a legal adult, I would encourage you to write carefully and thoughtfully and have someone you trust help you with thorough proof-reading and spell-checking before you submit your document to the court. Your question is written as you would say it if you were talking about the problem, and it explains the problem well. However, your writing, spelling and punctuation are not in standard English format. If you have to present any written testimony, make sure it is in correct form.

I hope things work out well for you. Good luck!

brettd's profile pic

brettd | High School Teacher | (Level 2) Educator Emeritus

Posted on

The laws vary from state to state, sometimes a great deal, so it depends where you are living.  The paper your mother signed giving your grandparents temporary custody has specific dates or limitations on it, most likely, or conditions by which she can regain custody.  Since you have been living with your grandparents for a while, a court may treat the temporary arrangement a little differently and grant your grandparents some rights.  Since you are only a year away from legal adulthood (able to choose with whom and where you live), a court might also consider what is motivating your parent to want to regain custody.

bigdreams1's profile pic

bigdreams1 | High School Teacher | (Level 1) Associate Educator

Posted on

Also realize, that the laws are different from state to state, so I would suggest that you contact a lawyer and see what the custody laws of your state are.

I am currently in a custody battle in South Dakota. Here, because my daughter is 15, the judge will ask her where she wants to be and will place a lot of weight on her wishes. He will also look at who the primary caretaker has been throughout the majority of her life, if there has been any neglect or abuse, what the financial situations are between the two parents, and how willing both parents are to be parents. So if all those things seem like they favor your grandparents, there is a good chance they will be able to keep you.

However, again, please check with someone who is familiar with the laws of your state.

litteacher8's profile pic

litteacher8 | High School Teacher | (Level 3) Distinguished Educator

Posted on

You can either retain the services of a lawyer to get another custody agreement, or try for emancipation since you are 17. Emancipation means that you are legally an adult, and in no one's custody. When you are an emancipated minor you can live wherever you wish. The downside is that no one will get a check for you, and you may not be eligible for benefits. You can also just explain your preferences to your mother.
larrygates's profile pic

larrygates | College Teacher | (Level 1) Educator Emeritus

Posted on

The standards most courts use is the "best interests of the child." Should this come down to a court battle, the court would examine these issues. Without knowing all the pertinent factors, I think there are two factors which argue heavily against your staying with your grandparents:

  • The fact that they have had custody of you for twelve years. Normally there needs to be a change of circumstances to justify a change in custody; and that change of circumstances must materially affect the child's welfare. There is a certain amount of inertia there, which weighs heavily in your grandparent's favor. Change of heart is not enough.
  • The fact that you are almost seventeen, and one year away from your legal majority means your wishes will be given considerable weight. The wishes of the child are often considered (but are not determinative) for child custody; however the wishes of an older child such as yourself carry considerably more weight than a much younger one.

So, without knowing all the facts, it is difficult to say what might happen; however from the limited information you have provided, my guess is that you will remain with your grandparents until at least your eighteenth birthday. At that point, you will be a legal adult, and can live where you please.

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