Home > Romeo and Juliet Text > Act III, Scene V - Page 2

LADY:

Here comes your father. Tell him so yourself,
And see how he will take it at your hands.

LADY:

Here comes your father. Tell him so yourself,
And see how he will take it from you.

Enter Capulet and Nurse.

CAP:

When the sun sets the air doth drizzle dew,
But for the sunset of my brother's son(130)
It rains downright.
How now? a conduit, girl? What, still in tears?
Evermore show'ring? In one little body
Thou counterfeit'st a bark, a sea, a wind:
For still thy eyes, which I may call the sea,(135)
Do ebb and flow with tears; the bark thy body is
Sailing in this salt flood; the winds, thy sighs,
Who, raging with thy tears and they with them,
Without a sudden calm will overset
Thy tempest-tossed body. How now, wife?(140)
Have you delivered to her our decree?

CAP:

When the sun sets, the air drizzles dew,
But for the funeral of my brother's son
It pours rain.
What’s going on? Still a fountain, girl? What, still in tears?
Forever showering? In one little body,
You look like a ship, a sea, a wind, all in one,
Because your eyes, which I may call the sea,
Ebb and flow with a tide of tears. Your body is the ship,
Sailing in this salt flood, the winds, your sighs.
You, raging with your tears and they with the ship, sea, and wind,
Without a sudden calm, will overturn
Your tempest-tossed body. What’s going on, wife!
Have you told her what we have decided for her?

LADY:

Ay, sir; but she will none, she gives you thanks.
I would the fool were married to her grave!

LADY:

Yes, sir; but she won’t have it. She gives you thanks.
I wish the foolish girl were married to her grave!

CAP:

Soft! take me with you, take me with you, wife.
How? Will she none? Doth she not give us thanks?(145)
Is she not proud? Doth she not count her blest,
Unworthy as she is, that we have wrought
So worthy a gentleman to be her bridegroom?

CAP:

What! Catch me, catch me, wife.
What do you mean “she won’t have it?” Doesn’t she give us thanks?
Isn’t she proud? Doesn’t she count her blessings that
Unworthy as she is, we have secured
So worthy a gentleman to be her bridegroom?

JUL:

Not proud you have, but thankful that you have.
Proud can I never be of what I hate,(150)
But thankful even for hate that is meant love.

JUL:

I’m not proud that you have, but I’m thankful that you have.
I can never be proud of what I hate,
But I can be thankful even for hate that is meant to be love.

CAP:

How, how, how, how, choplogic? What is this?
‘Proud’—and ‘I thank you’—and ‘I thank you not’—
And yet ‘not proud’? Mistress minion you,
Thank me no thankings, nor proud me no prouds,(155)
But fettle your fine joints 'gainst Thursday next
To go with Paris to Saint Peter's Church,
Or I will drag thee on a hurdle thither.
Out, you green-sickness carrion! Out, you baggage!
You tallow-face!(160)

CAP:

So that’s how it is now, arguing with choppy reasoning? What is this?
”Proud,” and, “I thank you,” and “I thank you not,”
And yet “not proud?” Mistress Darling, you --
Thank me no thankings, nor proud me no prouds,
But get your fine joints ready for next Thursday
To go with Paris to Saint Peter's Church,
Or I will drag you there on a cart made for traitors going to execution.
Get out, you green, diseased dead meat! Out, you bag of garbage!
You pale, ugly face!

LADY:

Fie, fie! what, are you mad?

LADY:

For shame, for shame! What, are you crazy?

JUL:

Good father, I beseech you on my knees,
Hear me with patience but to speak a word.

JUL:

Good father, I beg you on my knees,
To listen to me with patience. I only want to speak a word.

CAP:

Hang thee, young baggage! disobedient wretch!
I tell thee what—get thee to church a Thursday(165)
Or never after look me in the face.
Speak not, reply not, do not answer me!
My fingers itch. Wife, we scarce thought us blest
That God had lent us but this only child;
But now I see this one is one too much,(170)
And that we have a curse in having her.
Out on her, hilding!

CAP:

I’ll see you hang first, young filth! Disobedient wretch!
I’ll tell you what. Get yourself to church on Thursday,
Or never, after that, look me in the face.
Don’t speak, don’t reply, don’t answer me.
My fingers itch. Wife, we were just thinking ourselves blessed
That God had given us this only child,
But now I see that this one is one too many,
And that we are cursed in having her.
Throw her out, the good for nothing!

NURSE:

God in heaven bless her!
You are to blame, my lord, to rate her so.

NURSE:

God in heaven bless her!
You are to blame, my lord, to berate her like this.

CAP:

And why, my Lady Wisdom? Hold your tongue,(175)
Good Prudence. Smatter with your gossips, go!

CAP:

And why are you butting in, my lady wisdom? Hold your tongue,
Good prudence; go chat with your gossips!

NURSE:

I speak no treason.

NURSE:

I’m not telling a lie.

CAP:

O, God-i-god-en!

CAP:

O, God! You! Good night!

NURSE:

May not one speak?

NURSE:

Can’t someone speak?

CAP:

Peace, you mumbling fool!(180)
Utter your gravity o'er a gossip's bowl,
For here we need it not.

CAP:

Peace, you mumbling fool!
Talk about your serious speech over a gossip's bowl,
Because we don’t need it here!.

LADY:

You are too hot.

LADY:

You are too hot under the collar.

CAP:

God's bread! It makes me mad.
Day, night, hour, tide, time, work, play,(185)
Alone, in company, still my care hath been
To have her match'd; and having now provided
A gentleman of princely parentage,
Of fair demesnes, youthful, and nobly train'd,
Stuff'd, as they say, with honourable parts,(190)
Proportion'd as one's thought would wish a man—
And then to have a wretched puling fool,
A whining mammet, in her fortune's tender,
To answer ‘I'll not wed, I cannot love;
I am too young, I pray you pardon me’!(195)
But, an you will not wed, I'll pardon you.
Graze where you will, you shall not house with me.
Look to't, think on't; I do not use to jest.
Thursday is near; lay hand on heart, advise:
An you be mine, I'll give you to my friend;(200)
An you be not, hang, beg, starve, die in the streets,
For, by my soul, I'll ne'er acknowledge thee,
Nor what is mine shall never do thee good.
Trust to't. Bethink you. I'll not be forsworn.

Exit.

CAP:

God's bread! It makes me angry.
Day, night, hour, time, tide, work, play,
Alone, or in company, still my main concern has been
To have her matched to a good man, and now having provided
A gentleman of noble parentage,
Of beautiful lands and estates, youthful, and with noble manners,
Stuffed, as they say, with honorable parts,
Proportioned as woman's heart would wish a man to be built,
And then to have a wretched fool, crying like a baby,
A whining child, in her luck’s best offer,
To answer, “I'll not wed, I cannot love,
I am too young, I pray you pardon me.”
But, if you will not wed, I'll pardon you.
Eat where you can, you won’t live with me.
Look to it. Think on it, I’m not joking.
Thursday is near; swear to me, tell me.
If you are mine, I'll give you to my friend;
If you aren’t, go hang yourself, beg, starve, die in the streets,
Because, by my soul, I'll never acknowledge you exist,
And you will cut off from your inheritance.
Trust to it. Think about it. You won’t make a liar out of me.

JUL:

Is there no pity sitting in the clouds(205)
That sees into the bottom of my grief?
O sweet my mother, cast me not away!
Delay this marriage for a month, a week;
Or if you do not, make the bridal bed
In that dim monument where Tybalt lies.(210)

JUL:

Is there no pity sitting in the clouds
That sees into the bottom of my grief?
O, sweet my mother, don’t push me away!
Delay this marriage for a month, a week;
Or, if you don’t, make my bridal bed
In that dim tomb where Tybalt lies.

LADY:

Talk not to me, for I'll not speak a word.
Do as thou wilt, for I have done with thee.

LADY:

Don’t talk to me, because I won’t answer you.
Do what you want to do, because I’m finished with you.

Exit.

JUL:

O God!—O nurse, how shall this be prevented?
My husband is on earth, my faith in heaven.
How shall that faith return again to earth(215)
Unless that husband send it me from heaven
By leaving earth? Comfort me, counsel me.
Alack, alack, that heaven should practise stratagems
Upon so soft a subject as myself!
What say'st thou? Hast thou not a word of joy?(220)
Some comfort, Nurse.

JUL:

O God! O nurse! How can this wedding be prevented?
My husband is on earth, my faith in heaven.
How can I avoid committing a sin,
Unless the husband that heaven sent me
Dies? Comfort me. Advise me.
What a pity, what a pity that heaven should practice its strategies
On a weak subject such as I am!
What do you say? Don’t you have any word of joy?
Give me some comfort, nurse.

NURSE:

Faith, here it is.
Romeo is banish'd; and all the world to nothing
That he dares ne'er come back to challenge you;
Or if he do, it needs must be by stealth.(225)
Then, since the case so stands as now it doth,
I think it best you married with the County.
O, he's a lovely gentleman!
Romeo's a dishclout to him. An eagle, madam,
Hath not so green, so quick, so fair an eye(230)
As Paris hath. Beshrew my very heart,
I think you are happy in this second match,
For it excels your first; or if it did not,
Your first is dead—or 'twere as good he were
As living here and you no use of him.(235)

NURSE:

Well then, here it is. Romeo
Is banished, and all the world is nothing
If he ever dares to come back to fight for you.
Or if he does, he has to fight for you in secret.
Then, since that’s the story as it stands now,
I think it best for you to marry the count.
O, he's a lovely gentleman!
Romeo's a dish cloth compared to him. An eagle, madam,
Is not as green, as quick, and hasn’t so beautiful an eye
As Paris has. Curse my very heart,
I think you will be happy in this second marriage,
For it surpasses your first. Or if it doesn’t,
Your first marriage is dead; or it’s just as good that he was,
Not living here, and you can’t be a proper wife.

JUL:

Speak'st thou this from thy heart?

JUL:

Do you say this from heart?

NURSE:

And from my soul too;
Else beshrew them both.

NURSE:

And from my soul too
Or else curse them both.

JUL:

Amen!

JUL:

Amen!

NURSE:

What?(240)

NURSE:

What?

JUL:

Well, thou hast comforted me marvellous much.
Go in; and tell my lady I am gone,
Having displeas'd my father, to Laurence’ cell,
To make confession and to be absolv'd.

JUL:

Well, you have really comforted me a lot.
Go inside, and tell my mother that I’m going
to Lawrence' cell to make confession and be forgiven
Because I’ve made my father so angry.

NURSE:

Marry, I will; and this is wisely done.(245)

NURSE:

By Mary, I will. And you’re doing the right thing.

Exit.

JUL:

Ancient damnation! O most wicked fiend!
Is it more sin to wish me thus forsworn,
Or to dispraise my lord with that same tongue
Which she hath prais'd him with above compare
So many thousand times? Go, counsellor!(250)
Thou and my bosom henceforth shall be twain.
I'll to the friar to know his remedy.
If all else fail, myself have power to die.

JUL:

Damn, damn! O most wicked, evil woman!
Is it more sin to wish me to be a liar,
Or to curse my husband with the same tongue
That she has praised him with, above compare
So many thousand times? Go, advisor;
Our relationship has been cut in two. It’s over.
I'll go to the friar to know his solution.
If there isn’t a solution, I have the power to kill myself.

Exit.