Scene II

[Belmont]

Enter Portia with her waiting woman Nerissa.

PORTIA:

By my troth, Nerissa, my little body is a-weary of
this great world.

PORTIA:

Honestly, Nerissa, my little body is weary of this
great world.

NERISSA:

You would be, sweet madam, if your miseries were
in the same abundance as your good fortunes are; and yet,
for aught I see, they are as sick that surfeit with too much,(5)
as they that starve with nothing. It is no mean happiness,
therefore, to be seated in the mean; superfluity comes
sooner by white hairs, but competency lives longer.

NERISSA:

You would be, sweet madam, if your miseries were as abundant
as your good fortunes are; and yet, for all I see, they that are sick
from over-eating are as sick as those that starve with nothing.
It’s not an insignificant happiness, therefore, to be well situated in
regard to financial resources: having more than enough comes
at some time or other to old men, but having a sufficient income lasts longer.

PORTIA:

Good sentences, and well pronounced.

PORTIA:

Good sentences, and well said.

NERISSA:

They would be better, if well followed.(10)

NERISSA:

They would be better sentences, if you followed them well.

PORTIA:

If to do were as easy as to know what were good to
do, chapels had been churches, and poor men's cottages
princes' palaces. It is a good divine that follows his own
instructions: I can easier teach twenty what were good to
be done, than be one of the twenty to follow mine own(15)
teaching. The brain may devise laws for the blood; but a
hot temper leaps o'er a cold decree: such a hare is madness
the youth, to skip o'er the meshes of good counsel
the cripple. But this reasoning is not in the fashion to
choose me a husband:—O me, the word choose! I may(20)
neither choose whom I would, nor refuse whom I dislike;
so is the will of a living daughter curbed by the will of a
dead father:—Is it not hard, Nerissa, that I cannot choose
one, nor refuse none?

PORTIA:

If knowing what to do were as easy as knowing what was good to do,
chapels would have been churches, and poor men's cottages would have
been princes' palaces. It is a good prophet that follows his own instructions;
It’s easier for me to teach twenty people what was good to do than to be one
of that twenty and follow my own teaching. The brain may come up with
laws to control society, but one hot temper jumps over a cold law;
Madness the Youth is just such a jumper, skipping over the nets of Good
Advice the Cripple. But thinking this way is not the way to
choose a husband for me. Oh, me, the word “choose!” I cannot
choose someone I like or refuse someone I dislike;
so is the behavior of a living daughter curbed by the will of a dead father.
Isn’t it hard, Nerissa, that I cannot choose one or refuse none?

NERISSA:

Your father was ever virtuous; and holy men at their(25)
death have good inspirations; therefore, the lottery that
he hath devised in these three chests, of gold, silver, and
lead, (whereof who chooses his meaning chooses you,)
will, no doubt, never be chosen by any rightly, but one
who you shall rightly love. But what warmth is there in(30)
your affection towards any of these princely suitors that
are already come?

NERISSA:

Your father was always a holy man, and holy men have good
ideas when they die; so the lottery that he has thought up in these
three chests, made of gold, of silver, and of lead, by means of which
whoever chooses the right chest chooses you, will, no doubt, never be
chosen by the right man except the one you shall rightly love. But
what warmth is there in your affections towards any of these princes
that have already come to try?

PORTIA:

I pray thee, over-name them; and as thou namest
them I will describe them; and according to my description
level at my affection.(35)

PORTIA:

Please say their names again, and, as you name them, I’ll
describe them; and, according to my description, you can figure
out how I feel about them..

NERISSA:

First, there is the Neapolitan prince.

NERISSA:

First, there is the Neapolitan prince.

PORTIA:

Ay, that's a colt, indeed, for he doth nothing but talk
of his horse; and he makes it a great appropriation to his
own good parts that he can shoe him himself: I am much
afraid my lady his mother played false with a smith.(40)

PORTIA:

Yes, he’s a cunning fellow indeed, because he doesn’t do a thing
but talk about his horse; and he makes it a great attribute to
his own good qualities that he can shoe him himself; I am very afraid,
my lady, his mother had an affair with a blacksmith.

NERISSA:

Then, is there the county Palatine.

NERISSA:

Then there is the Count Palatine.

PORITA:

He doth nothing but frown; as who should say, An you
will not have me, choose; he hears merry tales, and smiles
not: I fear he will prove the weeping philosopher when he
grows old, being so full of unmannerly sadness in his youth.(45)
I had rather be married to a death's head with a bone in his
mouth, than to either of these. God defend me from these
two!

PORITA:

He doesn’t do a thing but frown, as someone would say, “If you will
not have me, choose.” He hears happy tales and doesn’t smile:
I’m afraid he will probably be the weeping philosopher when he grows old,
being so full of rude sadness in his youth. I would rather be married
to a skull with a bone in his mouth than to either of
these princes. God defend me from these two!

NERISSA:

How say you by the French lord, Monsieur Le Bon?

NERISSA:

What do you have to say about the French lord, Monsieur Le Bon?

PORTIA:

God made him, and therefore let him pass for a man.(50)
In truth, I know it is a sin to be a mocker; but, he! why, he
hath a horse better than the Neapolitan's; a better bad habit
of frowning than the count Palatine: he is every man in no
man: if a throstle sing he falls straight a capering; he will
fence with his own shadow: if I should marry him I should(55)
marry twenty husbands: If he would despise me I would forgive
him; for if he love me to madness I shall never requite
him.

PORTIA:

God made him, and so let him pass for a man. In
truth, I know it is a sin to be a mocker, but him! Why, he has a
horse better than the Neapolitan's, a better bad habit of
frowning than the Count Palatine; he is every man in no man. If a
thrush sings, he starts dancing right away; he will fence with
his own shadow; if I should refuse him, I would be refusing twenty
husbands. If he would only despise me, I would forgive him, because if he
loves me like crazy, I’ll never be able to return such love.

NERISSA:

What say you then to Falconbridge, the young baron
of England?(60)

NERISSA:

What do you say then about Falconbridge, the young baron of
England?

PORTIA:

You know I say nothing to him; for he understands not
me, nor I him: he hath neither Latin, French, nor Italian;
and you will come into the court, and swear that I have a
poor pennyworth in the English. He is a proper man's picture;
but, alas! who can converse with a dumb show? How(65)
oddly he is suited! I think he bought his doublet in Italy,
his round hose in France, his bonnet in Germany and his
behaviour everywhere.

PORTIA:

You know I say nothing to him, because he doesn’t understand me,
and I don’t understand him: He doesn’t know Latin, French, or Italian, and you
will come into the court and swear that I only know a penny’s worth
of English. He’s the picture of a proper man, but alas, who can
talk with someone who can’t talk? How oddly he is dressed! I think he
bought his shirt in Italy, his hose in France, his hat
in Germany, and his behavior everywhere.

NERISSA:

What think you of the Scottish lord, his neighbour?

NERISSA:

What do you think about the Scottish lord, his neighbor?

PORTIA:

That he hath a neighbourly charity in him; for he borrowed(70)
a box of the ear of the Englishman, and swore he would
pay him again when he was able: I think the Frenchman
became his surety, and sealed under for another.

PORTIA:

I think that he has neighborly charity in him, because he borrowed
a moneybox from the Englishman, and swore he would pay him
again when he was able; I think the Frenchman became his guarantor
and it was sealed by another.

NERISSA:

How like you the young German, the Duke of Saxony's
nephew?(75)

NERISSA:

How do you like the young German, the Duke of Saxony's nephew?

PORTIA:

Very vilely in the morning, when he is sober; and most
vilely in the afternoon, when he is drunk: when he is best,
he is a little worse than a man; and when he is worst, he is
little better than a beast: and the worst fall that ever fell, I
hope I shall make shift to go without him.(80)

PORTIA:

Very disgusting in the morning when he is sober, and most
disgusting in the afternoon when he is drunk: when he is best, he is
a little worse than a man, and when he is worst, he is little
better than a beast. If the worst that could happen happens, I hope I’ll
be able to go on without him.

NERISSA:

If he should offer to choose, and choose the right
casket, you should refuse to perform your father's will, if
you should refuse to accept him.

NERISSA:

If he offers to choose, and chooses the right chest,
you would be refusing to perform your father's will, if you
refused to accept him.

PORTIA:

Therefore, for fear of the worst, I pray thee, set a deep
glass of Rhenish wine on the contrary casket; for, if the(85)
devil be within and that temptation without, I know he
will choose it. I will do anything, Nerissa, ere I will be
married to a sponge.

PORTIA:

So, for fear of the worst, please set a deep
glass of Rhenish wine on the wrong chest; because if the devil were
within the chest and that temptation on top of it, I know he will choose it. I
will do anything, Nerissa, before I’ll be married to a sponge.

NERISSA:

You need not fear, lady, the having any of these
lords: they have acquainted me with their determinations:(90)
which is, indeed, to return to their home, and to
trouble you with no more suit; unless you may be won
by some other sort than your father's imposition, depending
on the caskets.

NERISSA:

You don’t need to be afraid, lady, of having any of these lords;
they have told me their intentions, which is
indeed to go back to their homes, and to trouble you with no more
suits, unless you may be won by some other way than your father's
command, that getting you depends on the chests.

PORTIA:

If I live to be as old as Sibylla I will die as chaste as(95)
Diana, unless I be obtained by the manner of my father's
will. I am glad this parcel of wooers are so reasonable;
for there is not one among them but I dote on his very
absence, and I pray God grant them a fair departure.

PORTIA:

If I live to be as old as Sibylla the witch, I’ll die as pure as
Diana the goddess of purity, unless I am obtained by the letter of my father's will.
I am glad this batch of would-be husbands are so reasonable; because there isn’t
one of them that I am not foolishly in love with his very absence, and I pray God
grant them a fair departure.

NERISSA:

Do you not remember, lady, in your father's time,(100)
a Venetian, a scholar and a soldier that came hither in
company of the Marquis of Montferrat?

NERISSA:

Don’t you not remember, lady, in your father's time, a Venetian, a
scholar and a soldier, that came here in the company of the Marquis
of Montserrat?

PORTIA:

Yes, yes, it was Bassanio; as I think, so was he
called.

PORTIA:

Yes, yes, it was Bassanio, I think, or so he was called.

NERISSA:

True, madam; he, of all the men that ever my foolish(105)
eyes looked upon, was the best deserving a fair lady.

NERISSA:

True, madam; he, that, of all the men that I have ever seen
with my foolish eyes, was the most deserving of a beautiful lady.

PORTIA:

I remember him well; and I remember him worthy
of thy praise.

Enter a Servingman.

How now! what news?

PORTIA:

I remember him well, and I remember him worthy of your praise.

How is it now! What’s the news?

SERVINGMAN:

The four strangers seek for you, madam, to take(110)
their leave: and there is a forerunner come from a fifth,
the Prince of Morocco; who brings word, the prince, his
master, will be here to-night.

SERVINGMAN:

The four strangers are looking for you, madam, to say their goodbyes,
and there is a messenger come from a fifth, the Prince of
Morocco, who brings word the Prince, his master, will be here
tonight.