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Is there something wrong with this sentence, or does it have no errors? * For most...

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duafarag | Student, Grade 10 | (Level 1) Honors

Posted May 30, 2013 at 12:22 PM via web

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Is there something wrong with this sentence, or does it have no errors?

* For most recent history, people have used energy wastefully, but now that supplies of essential fuels are becoming rapidly depleted, enviromentalists are urging people to change it.

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William Delaney | (Level 1) Distinguished Educator

Posted May 30, 2013 at 12:53 PM (Answer #1)

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Your sentence has no serious errors, but it could stand some improvement. I will copy it as you have written it and then make some suggestions for revision.

For most recent history, people have used energy wastefully, but now that supplies of essential fuels are becoming rapidly deplected, enviromentalists are urging people to change it.

First you should change "For most recent history."

Throughout most recent history, people have used energy wastefully, but now that essential fuels are becoming rapidly depleted, environmntalists are urging people to change it.

You are tackling a big topic when you talk about most recent history and "people." You would be wise to confine your topic to the U.S., because we have been more wasteful than any other people. In fact, some people, such as the Chinese and Koreans, have probably been very frugal in utilizing their resources.

Throughout most recent history, Americans have used energy wastefully, but now that fossil fuels are rapidly becoming depleted, environmentalists are urging us to change our habits.

I think we are talking about "non-renewable sources of energy," so it would be better to specify "fossil fuels."

It can be fun to write a sentence and then tinker with it until you feel that it represents your thought exactly. It is difficult, if not impossible, to say exactly what you mean with your first draft of a sentence, or a paragraph, or an entire essay. I'll make one more change.

Throughout our recent history, Americans have used energy wastefully, but now that fossil fuels are rapidly becoming depleted, environmentalists are urging us to change our bad habits.

I don't think it is only "environmentalists" who are warning us that we had better change our ways. Who else? Is there another term you could us instead of "environmentalists"? I don't really know exactly what an environmentalist is--although I have read and heard plenty of warnings about wasting fossil fuels, especially oil.

I hope these suggestions are helpful. I invite you to do a little more tinkering.

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