Please give me suggestions about how to improve this essay. 3rd rock from the Sun TV shows is a half an hour sci-fi sitcom on channel 20 screening on weeknights at 7:30 pm. 3rd Rock from the Sun...

Please give me suggestions about how to improve this essay. 

3rd rock from the Sun TV shows is a half an hour sci-fi sitcom on channel 20 screening on weeknights at 7:30 pm. 3rd Rock from the Sun is one of the most successful fantasy sitcom genre lasting six season and 139 episodes. It forecasts a group of aliens trying to pass as ‘typical’ earthlings while living among humans in ordinary suburbia, where they appear zany and occasionally deranged due to their spacey heritage. They become confused and entranced by the commonplace, from everyday things to emotion like love or aggression. 3rd Rock from the Sun have been nominated for and won numerous major television awards including “Best Edited Half-Hour Series for television” in 1999. The episode entitled ‘Moby Dick’ was created by Bonnie Turner and Terry Turner, who was also the direction and written by Michael Glouberman and Andrew Orenstein.  Moby Dick deals with facing one’s own emotions and relationship issues which many views may find relevant. 

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Ashley Kannan | Middle School Teacher | (Level 3) Distinguished Educator

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I think that the fundamental problem is that I sense two different essays in play here.  The first one overall deals with the sit- com and its overall reception.  I think that more detail is needed about why this particular show was received so well.  Essentially, I am not seeing why this show was the benefactor of so much critical and public praise.  If we make the argument that television is reflective, to an extent, of society, what is in this show that resonated so evidently with the public?  This is not entirely made clear.  It seems as if it is intimated, but the overall picture is not painted.  In addition, I would eliminate what channel it can be found and the times because this is more local than anything else and with syndication, this varies.

The second issue with the essay is its pivot into the "Moby Dick" episode.  I think that quotes would be needed here to indicate the title of the episode.  At the same time, some claims are made about the show and little is offered in terms of evidential support. For example, what in the show makes it "facing one’s own emotions and relationship issues which many views [sic] may find relevant"?  I am not seeing the analysis here which would strengthen the argument being made.

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