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If your girlfriend says she goes to the gym after work because you are never home and...

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micabu11 | Student, College Freshman | eNoter

Posted June 23, 2013 at 5:35 AM via web

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If your girlfriend says she goes to the gym after work because you are never home and you go out for drinks after work because she is working out, then your difference in perception is due to:

A) Punctuation

B) Stereotyping

C) Fundamental attribution error

D) Negativity effect

E) Self-serving bias

I am taking a summer class in interpersonal communication and am having a hard time connecting information from the book to real life scenarios. This is the type of question I am struggling with.

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pohnpei397 | College Teacher | (Level 3) Distinguished Educator

Posted June 23, 2013 at 5:51 AM (Answer #1)

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The best answer to this question is A.  This is an example of the problem of punctuation in interpersonal communication.  Punctuation problems arise because of the fact that communication is constant and people do not always agree with one another with respect to when that communication is punctuated.

When we are in a relationship, we are in fairly constant communication.  We typically try to understand the communication better by breaking it up into smaller pieces and segments.  This is punctuation.  We decide for ourselves when one interaction has started and another has ended.  The problem is that we do not always agree on where to put this punctuation.

In the scenario you are giving us here, the boyfriend and girlfriend do not agree on when the interaction started.  They do not agree on what action led to what reaction.  The girlfriend believes that the boyfriend’s absence came first.  She feels that she went to work out as a reaction to that absence.  The boyfriend sees things differently.  He thinks that the girlfriend went to work out first and that his going out for a drink was just a reaction to her action. 

Thus, the two of them do not agree on where to put the punctuation in this continuing interaction.

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