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Question:

prasip
prasip
Student
Graduate School

 

Improve the sentence in sense of attitude.

Don't drop in without an appointment. your counselor or caseworker may be unavailable.

 

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Posted by prasip on Thursday September 17, 2009 at 8:52 PM and tagged with business, communication.

Answers:

  1. krishna-agrawala
    krishna-agrawala Teacher
    Graduate School

    eNotes Editor

    Best answer as selected by question asker.

    When we speak to others we convey some information to others. The impact this information will have on others depends on the basic facts conveyed as well as the tone in which the facts are conveyed. It is possible to sound rude and uncaring, or to sound curt and helpful.

    The example of the two sentences message you have given sound negative. It sounds as if you are preventing a person from acting freely. Also you are talking about what all can go wrong. This may sound like a threat. There are many ways in which these sentences can be changed to sound more positive and helpful. For example:

    Please do take an appointment before you drop in to ensure that your counselor or case worker will be available.

    Given below are some more examples of sentences which are avoidably rude or negative

    1. You failed to sign your check
    2. Your error on your tax form will result in a penalty to you.
    3. If you have submitted a travel request as you claim, we have failed to receive it.

    These sentences can be rewritten as:

    1. You need to sign your check.
    2. To avoid penalty, please ensure that your tax form is error free.
    3. We don't seem to have received your travel request.

    Rate answer:

    Posted by krishna-agrawala on Thursday September 17, 2009 at 9:07 PM

  2. grgsiocl
    grgsiocl Teacher

    1. Fix an appointment with your counsellor or caseworker, or they will be unavailable.

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    Posted by grgsiocl on Friday September 18, 2009 at 5:52 AM